Soul Mates?
- Friday, May 13 2011 @ 09:05 am
- Contributed by: Jet
- Views: 1,374
Every couple has their own “story,” their own eerie coincidences: “We lived on the same street for two years and I never met him!” or “If my car hadn’t broken down the same day hers had, we never would have met at the car dealership!” Hearing these stories, it’s easy to wonder: are there really “soul mates”? Are some people really “meant for each other”?
No one really knows for sure. However, though I like to hear about crazy coincidences as much as the next girl, I don’t actually think there’s only one person for everyone out there. More likely, there’s several potential good matches out there; maybe dozens, maybe even hundreds. However, in my opinion, that makes a good love story all the more special, or even - dare I say it - magical.
You see, I am a big fan of the concept of free will - that we can choose what we do with our lives. Now let’s think about the subject of commitment, and what it means. When you find someone you love, does that mean you no longer find anyone else attractive - even movie stars? Of course not. There are still attractive people out there, maybe even attractive opportunities. People in a committed relationship aren’t robots with blinders. However, when you make the decision to commit to only one person, you’re essentially saying, “I know what I could be missing - and I’m okay with that.” That’s a pretty powerful decision. Unless, of course, you believe in soul mates - then you’re just doing what you were fated to do. It sort of takes the gravity out of the decision, doesn’t it?
Another reason I choose not to believe in soul mates is that I like to believe that there’s hope for the people who have found themselves in heartbreaking circumstances. Maybe there’s some reason two perfectly in-love, compatible people can’t be together. Maybe a happy couple is torn apart due to death. I’d like to believe that you might have been perfectly happy in that first relationship - and that the possibility exists that you can be perfectly happy again. I’ve known widows who have gone on to have long and fulfilling second marriages - but that doesn’t diminish the love they shared with their first spouse. Why make them choose which one was their “true love”?
Finally, it makes the dating world seem a lot more manageable when you’re just trying to find a fantastic match, instead of The fantastic match. Maybe there’s someone in town. Maybe not. But chances are strong that there’s not only one good choice, and she lives in Singapore.
Then once you find someone to build a relationship, chances are strong that you’ll find those funny coincidences. It’s fun to wonder if maybe, somehow, you were destined to be together. But I find that love is magical and mysterious enough, just on its own.
No one really knows for sure. However, though I like to hear about crazy coincidences as much as the next girl, I don’t actually think there’s only one person for everyone out there. More likely, there’s several potential good matches out there; maybe dozens, maybe even hundreds. However, in my opinion, that makes a good love story all the more special, or even - dare I say it - magical.
You see, I am a big fan of the concept of free will - that we can choose what we do with our lives. Now let’s think about the subject of commitment, and what it means. When you find someone you love, does that mean you no longer find anyone else attractive - even movie stars? Of course not. There are still attractive people out there, maybe even attractive opportunities. People in a committed relationship aren’t robots with blinders. However, when you make the decision to commit to only one person, you’re essentially saying, “I know what I could be missing - and I’m okay with that.” That’s a pretty powerful decision. Unless, of course, you believe in soul mates - then you’re just doing what you were fated to do. It sort of takes the gravity out of the decision, doesn’t it?
Another reason I choose not to believe in soul mates is that I like to believe that there’s hope for the people who have found themselves in heartbreaking circumstances. Maybe there’s some reason two perfectly in-love, compatible people can’t be together. Maybe a happy couple is torn apart due to death. I’d like to believe that you might have been perfectly happy in that first relationship - and that the possibility exists that you can be perfectly happy again. I’ve known widows who have gone on to have long and fulfilling second marriages - but that doesn’t diminish the love they shared with their first spouse. Why make them choose which one was their “true love”?
Finally, it makes the dating world seem a lot more manageable when you’re just trying to find a fantastic match, instead of The fantastic match. Maybe there’s someone in town. Maybe not. But chances are strong that there’s not only one good choice, and she lives in Singapore.
Then once you find someone to build a relationship, chances are strong that you’ll find those funny coincidences. It’s fun to wonder if maybe, somehow, you were destined to be together. But I find that love is magical and mysterious enough, just on its own.
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