The Old-Fashioned Way: How to Meet Men in Bars

I'm a big fan of online dating, but I like to advise people to keep their options open because you never know where you might meet the love of your life - at a friend's party, at the grocery store, on Match.com, or at the bar across the street from work. There are many opportunities we don't take every day, so now is the time to let go of the endless list of chores that need to get done in favor of a little spontaneity.

What I mean by spontaneity is - instead of going to the grocery store or going home after work to do laundry, why not try going solo to a bar in your neighborhood? If you're more comfortable bringing a friend, be my guest, but don't let that stop you from getting out there and letting go of some of your fears. It's important in life, and especially in dating, to try things outside of our comfort zones every so often. And that means striking up a conversation with someone sitting next to you at the bar, or saying hello to the woman in line behind you at the coffee shop. A few extra risks in life may be worth it.

Following are some tips to help you strike up that first conversation at a bar:

Sit next to someone. Don't hide away in the far corner at the end of the bar to avoid looking like you're alone - instead, put yourself in the center of the action. It's much easier to talk to people when they are closer to you.

Talk to the bartender. I've rarely met an unfriendly bartender, especially when I'm flying solo. Be friendly and introduce yourself, and strike up a conversation if it's not too busy. They can help you warm up to talking to the guys sitting next to you. (And sometimes you might get a free appetizer or drink...shhh.)

Put the phone down. I know it's easier to have your phone in your hand when you're by yourself. But don't expect anyone to start talking to you - would you approach someone who was wrapped up in an email or text? It closes you off to the people around you, so don't rely on your phone to make you feel less alone. Be ok with putting it down for a while, and pay more attention to what is going on around you, where the opportunities really exist.

Make eye contact. If someone catches your eye at the other end of the bar, don't look away. Make eye contact and smile back. There's nothing wrong with being friendly or approachable, even if you're not initially attracted.

Putting yourself out there means warming up to the people around you. Who knows - one of them might have a friend who will be the love of your life. Why not take a chance and strike up a conversation?