Making the Tough Call
- Friday, November 04 2011 @ 09:29 am
- Contributed by: Jet
- Views: 1,260
So you’ve met someone who really seems nice on an online dating site, and you’ve set a date to meet. You’re looking forward to it - and then the unthinkable, worst-case scenario happens: you start to feel sick. Your nose gets stuffy and you feel like you’ve been run over by a truck. Your stomach is roiling and you think dinner may lead to a more ‘revealing’ time than you’d ever like. Sure, you’d like to call off your date, but what if they think you’re just making excuses?
First and foremost, if it’s nondescript nausea we’re talking about, take careful inventory of your body. Is this possibly a bad case of nerves? The nervous brain can trick the body with very real symptoms. However, even with something a symptom as straightforward as nausea, you can usually feel the difference between nerves, bad food, and the flu. There’s nothing wrong with being sick; just make sure you’re being honest with yourself.
Conversely, don’t try to talk yourself into going through with the date when you know you really are coming down with something. All that will result is that you will spread your germs around - to your date, and to the innocent people around you. Even if you don‘t have anything contagious - say, a flare-up of a chronic illness - do you really want to try to make a first impression while you’re miserable? You owe it to yourself to give yourself a fair chance, and smiling through pain or illness is not the way to go.
It’s hard to cancel a date, but it’s often the only choice. When explaining why you have to cancel, especially if it’s over the phone, I have but one rule: you don’t necessarily have to be completely honest, but don’t lie. Confused? Well, let’s say your illness is something rather embarrassing, like stomach troubles. You don’t have to go in graphic detail, but don’t make up some random illness to cover it up - you’ll only sound fishy, and your date might wonder why you’re really canceling. It’s simple enough to say that you’re ill. If pressed, say it’s personal - or heck, say it’s embarrassing and you’d rather not say. It’s the truth, after all.
If you’re the one canceling, make sure you’re the one following up and rescheduling, too. Remember, your date is probably as nervous about the prospect of meeting someone new as you are - staying on top of rescheduling will provide reassurance that you didn’t cancel out of cold feet.
No one wants to cancel a date, especially a first meeting. Still, in certain circumstances it’s best for everyone, and it’s up to you to be the discerning adult and make that difficult decision. If you’re open and honest, however, it shouldn’t set you back in your potential relationship at all - merely delay your beginning.
First and foremost, if it’s nondescript nausea we’re talking about, take careful inventory of your body. Is this possibly a bad case of nerves? The nervous brain can trick the body with very real symptoms. However, even with something a symptom as straightforward as nausea, you can usually feel the difference between nerves, bad food, and the flu. There’s nothing wrong with being sick; just make sure you’re being honest with yourself.
Conversely, don’t try to talk yourself into going through with the date when you know you really are coming down with something. All that will result is that you will spread your germs around - to your date, and to the innocent people around you. Even if you don‘t have anything contagious - say, a flare-up of a chronic illness - do you really want to try to make a first impression while you’re miserable? You owe it to yourself to give yourself a fair chance, and smiling through pain or illness is not the way to go.
It’s hard to cancel a date, but it’s often the only choice. When explaining why you have to cancel, especially if it’s over the phone, I have but one rule: you don’t necessarily have to be completely honest, but don’t lie. Confused? Well, let’s say your illness is something rather embarrassing, like stomach troubles. You don’t have to go in graphic detail, but don’t make up some random illness to cover it up - you’ll only sound fishy, and your date might wonder why you’re really canceling. It’s simple enough to say that you’re ill. If pressed, say it’s personal - or heck, say it’s embarrassing and you’d rather not say. It’s the truth, after all.
If you’re the one canceling, make sure you’re the one following up and rescheduling, too. Remember, your date is probably as nervous about the prospect of meeting someone new as you are - staying on top of rescheduling will provide reassurance that you didn’t cancel out of cold feet.
No one wants to cancel a date, especially a first meeting. Still, in certain circumstances it’s best for everyone, and it’s up to you to be the discerning adult and make that difficult decision. If you’re open and honest, however, it shouldn’t set you back in your potential relationship at all - merely delay your beginning.
Subscribe
