Can an Online Dater Really be “Catfished?”

If you've checked out the news lately, you've likely seen the story about the Notre Dame football player and Heisman trophy hopeful Manti Te'o, who got scammed via an online romance.

There's a term for what happened to him - called catfished, or being the victim of an online dating scam. Basically, Te'o claims he was duped. He fell in love with a woman whom he met online and called his girlfriend. She was allegedly sick with a terminal illness, and then Te'o found out that she died just before his big game, and was dealing with her loss while trying to prepare for the game. The love story was epic, and Te'o was crushed.

But as it turned out, she never actually existed.

While there's some debate as to how much Te'o knew beforehand, he maintains he was in love and is devastated by the turn of events.

He's not the only one. Many people have been scammed online - some with financial consequences as well as emotional. Some people use online dating as a way to manipulate - to create a false sense of intimacy so that their online victims will do what they ask. It can happen to anyone, even football players who live their lives in the spotlight. So the real question is, if you're online dating, how do you protect yourself?

Following are some rules to prevent being scammed online:

Don't give out any personal information. This includes the basics, such as last name, finances, and where you live or work. You need to develop a comfortable level of trust (including seeing each other in person!) before divulging anything that could compromise your security and safety.

Ask to meet your online date sooner than later. If she avoids meeting you or keeps making excuses and canceling, likely it's for a reason. She doesn't want you to know who she really is. Consider flaky behavior a red flag.

Don't become intimate until you meet. What I mean by this is, some people have a tendency to fantasize about a relationship before it's even begun. If your online date is wooing you with affection and praise via email, texts or chats, be cautious. Intimacy is built up over time (and in person), so don't let your heart get away from you when the relationship hasn't moved beyond the virtual realm.

Watch for red flags. Does this person ask for money or favors? Do things seem to always be going wrong? (Te'o's girlfriend was sick with cancer while they virtually dated.) If your love interest has a lot of challenges, issues and problems before you've even established an in-person relationship, then chances are, you're being catfished.