5 Signs that He’s Boyfriend Material

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We hear a lot of daters complain about how tough it is to find a boyfriend or girlfriend. Because there are people who casually date over apps, behave badly with each other, or mislead their dates, it’s discouraging to think about finding a serious relationship. Many of us paint men and women in broad brushstrokes – good or bad.

But this is simply not accurate.

Instead of stereotyping someone else as the "bad guy" or falling into old patterns when a date doesn’t work out, or getting discouraged that there are “no good ones out there,” change your perspective. There are ways to tell if a guy is boyfriend material before you get your heart broken:

He calls to follow up.

While it’s true that some guys disappear into the horizon when they are not that interested, a guy who’s boyfriend material will make himself known. He will call to ask you out, follow up after a date, and make plans with you. If he wants to date you, the first thing to observe is how he reaches out to you.

You’re not his back-up plan.

A man who’s boyfriend material wants to pursue you. He is proactive about making plans with you, because he doesn’t want to see you find someone else first. Instead of calling you at nine o’clock on a Sunday night to meet for a drink, he makes plans days in advance for Saturday night.

You feel comfortable around him.

It’s important to feel comfortable around anyone you date, but some people feel more like “home” than others. A guy who is boyfriend material feels good to be around. You enjoy spending time with him, and you aren’t worried so much about what you say or do that might turn him off. Instead of your mind spinning or feeling nervous, he makes you feel more relaxed the more you get to know him.

He’s genuinely curious about you.

Does he ask questions, and is he interested in how you view the world? Some guys ask questions because they feel it’s expected of them, but they don’t really care to understand who you are or what you think. A man who is boyfriend material will want to get to know the real you.

You don’t second-guess what he says.

As women, we spend a lot of time analyzing the men we date. We wonder what they are thinking, or if what they say is really true. We might be confused when they proclaim how much they like us, but then we don’t hear from them for days at a time. We might wonder about excuses he makes, or if his life seems mysterious. If he feel unavailable to you, especially emotionally, he probably is. When a guy is relationship material, he goes out of his way to make sure you are first, and that he means what he says with no second-guessing. Actions speak louder than words.