Contributed by: kellyseal Friday, August 09 2013 @ 06:25 am
Trying to understand the opposite sex when it comes to dating can be frustrating. I don't know how many times I analyzed how someone else felt about me or what they wanted. (A good time? A relationship? A friends with benefits situation?) For example, if a man went out of his way to come see a band with me, or if he was flirting with me all night, telling me how wonderful I was, I thought...he must like me as much as I like him. But then why wasn't he calling me?
I assumed I knew how these men felt based on a few really awesome dates we'd had - I was certain if we connected so much when we were physically around each other, he must be thinking about me when I wasn't there, too.
Was I wrong.
Men are pretty predictable when they are falling for a woman. He might be attracted to you, but that doesn't mean he wants to move forward into relationship territory. It's important to pick up on a few basic cues to see if the feeling is mutual:
He calls you consistently. Wondering why he's suddenly MIA after being all hot and heavy with you on your last date? I've been there - we think of all kinds of excuses as to why he doesn't call. Maybe he's too busy with work or maybe he's just not "a phone person." But we're not doing ourselves any favors by excusing him. The point is, if he really wants to call you, even if he's in a hospital somewhere, he will call.
He's not mysterious. While Hollywood movies like to tell us differently, men who are interested in a long term relationship don't disappear or keep part of their lives hidden. There's nothing sexy about someone who hides. A man who's interested will want you to know where he is. He wants to introduce you to friends and family. He makes plans with you. If he's not being straightforward about how he spends his time, likely you're not the only one in the picture.
He's not consumed by career ambitions. It took me a long time to figure this one out, because I assumed most of the men I dated put their careers first, relationships second. I was used to being called inconsistently or infrequently, chalking it up to "when the timing is right, he'll come around." But this isn't true. No matter where he is in his career, if you're right for each other, he will make time for your relationship.
His eyes are on you. Ever been on a date with a man you're crazy about, and he seems really distracted? If a man is really interested, he makes sure to pay attention to you. He doesn't get distracted by who else is there, including other women.