Contributed by: kellyseal on Wednesday, July 15 2015 @ 08:18 am
Last modified on
Tired of feeling like you’re in a dating rut? Sometimes Tinder is fun, but it doesn’t yield the long-term results you crave. If you really want things to change, you’re going to have to explore other options and mix up your routine.
Change is hard – it requires getting out of your comfort zone and putting in some effort. I think that Tinder has been such an attractive app because it takes all of the effort out of dating, leaving it to be more of a game to pass the time. Don’t get me wrong – there are couples who met over Tinder, but they also made an effort to meet each other in person, too. Dating has to happen for a relationship to evolve.
Instead of relying on your dating apps like Tinder, it’s time to explore your options. Traditional online dating sites – especially those that charge a fee for their matching services – tend to attract daters who are a little more serious, a bit more invested. Mix up your routine by joining Match.com or eHarmony, and enlisting a friend to help craft your profile. (I find that many people aren’t very accurate with describing themselves – either they try to create a certain “image” and don’t come across as trustworthy or real, or they downplay their assets, thinking humility is a good trait to attract someone romantically. It’s not.
Matchmaking services are also an interesting option, because they are a little more curated and provide a higher level of customized service. If this kind of thing intimidates you, start with a service like “It’s Just Lunch.” It’s Just Lunch provides a way to cut to the chase, where you are set up on a simple lunch date with a match to see if you click. It’s casual, but at least you get to meet in person to see if there’s any chemistry, rather than dealing with messages from dating apps which go nowhere.
Dating apps are a good thing, they just aren’t able to provide a different type of experience – they are for quick views and snap judgments, and people move rather quickly through them. When you meet someone via an online dating site or service however, the process moves a bit slower – you message back and forth, you are encouraged to meet in person, and you get a chance to “date” rather than sort through endless options. There’s something to be said for taking your time.