A Dating App Employee Reveals Her Top Insider Tips
Contributed by: ElyseRomano on Monday, September 12 2016 @ 10:54 am
Last modified on
Alex Williamson knows a thing or two about dating. The 28-year-old joined the Bumble team a few months before launch, and is now the app’s director of creative marketing and brand copywriter. If you’ve seen Bumble’s viral response[*1] to a finance bro (also known as "The Connor Letter”), you’ve seen Williamson’s work.
Refinery29 recently sat down with Williamson to get an insider’s perspective on the online dating industry. She shared what she’s learned working behind the scenes at one of the world’s most popular dating apps, offering advice on how to write a bio, how to choose a profile picture, how to identify red flags, and more. Her top tips include:
#1 Express your personality in your profile.
Bland is boring. Bland doesn’t get dates. Bland doesn’t belong in your bio. Williamson suggests showing off your sense of humor (if you have one) to kickstart conversations. A cheeky profile or message is infinitely more enticing than “Hi, how are you?”
Quirkiness is also an effective icebreaker. “I remember seeing one guy's bio where he had a list of three things he enjoyed and one of those things was watching dogs back up,” Williamson says. “I still think about that — it's hilarious!” An endearingly eccentric comment makes you memorable and offers suitors an easy conversation starter
#2 Skip the selfies.
It’s almost impossible to imagine a dating profile without selfies in 2016, but Williamson recommends against them. One too many self-snapped portraits makes you look like a narcissist, she cautions, and potential dates may feel you’re inaccessible. While a selfie or two can stay, “the more photos that you can have that are candid and show you with friends, the better you'll convey who you are and what your world is like.”
#3 Identify red flags and don’t excuse bad behavior.
Bumble is an especially pro-woman, anti-creep app, but Williamson’s advice holds true for any dating service. One of the perks of online dating is your ability to block and report any suspicious or abusive users. Don’t hesitate to do so if the situation warrants it.
Even if the user isn’t doing something that technically merits suspension from the app, there’s no reason to put up with or play along with rudeness. Williamson is emphatic: “Nobody should make you feel anything but good in that first conversation. If anyone talks to you in a way that makes you feel uncomfortable, leave the conversation. Don't write a gratuitous 'haha' back to something you don't think is funny."
#4 Keep an open mind.
One of the worst things you can do while dating - online or off - is to put too much pressure on the situation. Every date won’t be The One - some may become friends, others business connections, others nothing at all. And it’s ok. Be open to meeting anyone in any capacity. “As long as you're yourself from the beginning, you're more likely to retain a connection — even if it isn't a romantic one — since you'll both respect each other as people,” says Williamson.
Read the rest of the interview on Refinery29[*2] .