Contributed by: kellyseal on Thursday, March 08 2012 @ 09:10 am
Last modified on
Dates can be nerve-wracking. You don't know what to expect or if there will be chemistry, and you spend a lot of time wondering what your date thinks of you. There's so much anticipation and build-up that comes with dating that when little things go wrong, it can make you even more nervous and upset.
Have you ever been on a date where he or she showed up an hour late, or more? Did she call to let you know he was stuck in traffic, or did she just keep you waiting? Did you feel a sense of indignation? Did he apologize and explain, or did he just assume nothing was wrong and started conversation as though nothing had happened?
I've been on a few dates where I was kept waiting without a phone call, and it didn't feel good. In fact, I felt like I was last on my date's priority list, which doesn't bode well for the future of the relationship. How someone treats you on the first few dates can be a good indicator of how he'll treat you as time goes on. It doesn't get better, but it can get worse.
While I'm all for giving people a real chance on every date, if someone is being disrespectful that's not a good sign of things to come - and you should run in the other direction. Keeping someone waiting for an hour without calling (with no apologies or explanations) is disrespectful.
Some other warning signs that he's being disrespectful:
If he criticizes - a lot. If your date takes every opportunity to be critical or say nasty things about other people, chances are he will eventually say them about you. Do you want to be subjected to this kind of behavior?
If he treats the waitstaff poorly. If he refuses to leave a decent tip, or talks down to the people serving you when you're on a date, proceed with caution. A good man or woman treats everyone as a human being.
If he talks about his terrible exes or bad dates. Maybe he makes you laugh with his stories about bad dates or all of his crazy exes, but be warned: you may be next on his list. Steer clear of men (or women) who do nothing but complain about previous partners. For one, you don't need to hear about it (especially on a first date), and you don't want to date someone who only finds fault with other people, never himself.
If he doesn't listen. While some men get nervous and tend to talk a lot on dates, there's a difference between them and someone who actively doesn't listen. If he's too busy talking about himself or looking around at the other women walking by to pay attention to your questions or anything else you're saying, this is a red flag. Move on.