Contributed by: Jet on Wednesday, January 19 2011 @ 08:33 am
Last modified on
With the approach of the new year, several people I know are contemplating giving online dating a shot. Still, they have their worries. “What about scams?” they ask me. “How can I tell if someone really looks like their picture? What about safety issues?”
We’ll ignore, for the moment, that most of those dangers exist in meeting any new person and are not exclusive to online dating. The fears of my friends remind me that when we dissect the tips and tricks of dating, we often leave out two very important elements: common sense and gut intuition.
In reality, intuition should always be present when we interact with people; we may be able to consciously analyze this or that, but often other parts of our brain are working faster than we realize. Those “gut feelings” can actually be based on sound logic - and can help us avoid situations we’d regret. Does that woman seem like she’s hiding something? Maybe she is. Does that guy give off a slimy vibe? There may be a good reason for that.
Of course, intuition works best when it’s in conjunction with common sense. We can have “good feelings” or “bad feelings” about people or situations, but that doesn’t mean we should turn off our brains and let our gut do the thinking. After all, our emotions - even our hormones - can get in the way of pure logic and give us inaccurate “feelings.” Thus, when we’re planning a date, we need to think past the excitement of a potential relationship, and consider: does this seem like a safe location for a first date? Does everything seem on the up-and-up? Is there a reason why this person is asking me for my credit card information?
Nothing is ever one hundred percent certain when you’re dealing with another human being; there’s no real way to make yourself certain about the intentions of a brand-new acquaintance. However, with a combination of intuition and common sense (and maybe a dash of research into safe dating practices), you’ll be as safe as you possibly can be.