Contributed by: Erika on Sunday, October 18 2009 @ 11:16 am
Last modified on
The good times with someone you’re dating are always good. But what about when you just seem to hit a wall or your perfect partner does something that’s not-so-perfect? Having an open line of communication in your relationship will not only help keep the air clear but pave the way for a relationship filled with affection instead of pent-up angst. Here are some tips to help you navigate the rougher waters with your partner.
Count to ten…or three days. The moral being, don’t be reactionary and a hot head. If your partner does something that upsets you or just doesn’t sit well with your better sensibilities, give yourself a few minutes (or even a few days) to think about why that upset you. When you’re ready to talk, it’s likely you’ll be able to have a much calmer conversation driven by reason than emotion.
Leave electronics out of it. While every couple communicates differently, it’s unlikely that emotionless forms of communication like email and texting will help you have a productive discussion. Pick up the phone, call your partner, and tell them you’d like to talk about the situation in person instead of via your fingertips. Emoticons only go so far.
It’s OK to be upset. Sure, sometimes we all overreact. We’re not perfect and we shouldn’t expect our partners to be, either. We all do things that tick off our mates from time to time, and if we keep this in mind, it’s easier to understand how your perfect partner made a slip. You’ve got every right to feel hurt or angry with your partner, and the same goes for your partner with you. You can agree to disagree but it’s never OK to tell your partner they’re stupid for letting something upset them. While you might not understand their reaction, they’re entitled to it and you can find a way to move forward instead of dwelling on what caused the hurt.