Contributed by: Jet on Friday, March 18 2011 @ 09:09 am
Last modified on
In online dating, most people consider the first contact with a potential match to be the obviously-titled “first-contact email.” While the first-contact email is technically the first time you initiate interaction with a specific person, it’s not really the first time you’re beginning a conversation. And no, the real beginning is not a nudge, wink, or poke, either - those wishy-washy devices are best left alone. No, instead, the conversation actually begins in your online profile.
You see, your profile shouldn’t just be a resume or a list of information you half-heartedly throw out into the ether; it should be an invitation to learn more, to continue a conversation with someone who already seems intriguing. But how to create that sort of profile?
First, write the profile as if you were talking with a friend, just to get the creative juices flowing. What sort of funny story from your recent history would you tell? After you’ve written the “friend email,” pull back and look at it critically. Is there anything you can pull from it? Is your funny story appropriate to share with someone you’ve only just met? A complicated story about work would be too lengthy; an anecdote about the time you knocked down a display of toilet paper in your haste to grab the open checkout line is just fine.
Next, remember that you’re talking to someone for the first time. Obviously, they need to know background information, so fill that in where appropriate. Don’t give dry laundry lists; write as you would if you were telling them the information in person.
When you’re writing about your ideal match, remember that the match is meant to read it, and identify with it. As such, stick to qualities that are specific (“you’re independent”) but not too physical (“you have red hair”). Try throwing out a few possibilities (“you might like bowling or trivia”). People will tend to zero in on what applies to them, and forget the rest.
Finally, end your profile with a question. That way, everyone who reads your profile will have an instant topic of conversation when they email you. Of course, the second big step to profile writing is editing; polish it up! Make sure it flows, and isn’t just a bunch of disjointed sentences. Writing a profile with a conversational style might trickier than laundry lists or resumes, but it starts the dialogue for you; the hardest work is already done!