Contributed by: kellyseal on Tuesday, July 06 2010 @ 09:30 am
Last modified on
First dates can come with a lot of expectations. You want to be attracted to the person you're meeting, and you want to feel attractive. You want things to go smoothly, which puts more pressure on a tense situation because usually, first dates are awkward and uncomfortable.
So, what do you do to feel less nervous and more comfortable in your own skin? Here are some things to try:
Pick a place you are familiar with to meet. Maybe you're considering the new upscale restaurant in your neighborhood to impress your date, but refrain from doing this for a first date if you're nervous. Choose a place that you've been before where you feel comfortable, and preferably a casual place so you don't feel uptight and formal. When you are more relaxed, dates often go more smoothly.
Wear something that is comfortable, but makes you feel confident and sexy. Rather than going out and buying something new that looks trendy for your first date, wear something that you know makes you feel attractive. It's also best to go with what makes you comfortable---the last thing you want to be thinking about on a date is how your shoes or your shoulder straps are hurting you.
Don't feel the need to talk all the time. Women are especially guilty of this. If there is a pause in the conversation, don't try to cover it up by going on about your cat or the people in your office. Also, don't feel the need to constantly ask questions; nobody likes to feel interrogated. It's okay to sit back, relax, and make eye contact rather than small talk.
Don't go overboard on drinking. Sure, we all like to feel relaxed and alcohol does help in these situations, but know your body. Don't drink too fast or try to cover your nervousness by drinking too much. It will be obvious to your date if you're bordering on drunk, and usually a turn-off.
This isn't your job, so take a deep breath and relax. Your work day is hurried, but there is no reason to rush through a date like you're on a mission. A date isn't a job interview or an attempt to land a client---it is supposed to be informal and hopefully fun. Don't bring your business persona; leave that for your boss. Instead, think of your date as meeting a new friend. The potential for romance is there when you relax and be yourself.