Contributed by: Jet on Wednesday, March 14 2012 @ 09:18 am
Last modified on
It’s not uncommon to hear people lament about how difficult it is to date as an adult. When you’re in your teens or early twenties, you might be in high school or college. You’re in a community comprised almost entirely of your peers, for perhaps the only time in your adult life. And most of those peers are probably single, and looking for love themselves. It’s easy to look back longingly on that time and feel that youth is wasted on the young.
But not everything is easier about dating when you’re younger. In many respects, the “dating game” gets easier the older you get. First, there’s the issue of decision-making: some claim your brain isn’t even fully equipped for major decision-making until your early twenties. Whether or not that’s true, it’s certainly flooded with hormones, potentially leading to bigger mistakes and messier relationships in your youth.
Next, there’s “game-playing” - or a lack thereof. The more mature you become, the less guesswork goes into dating. Adults likely have a better sense of who they are and what they’re looking for, and they’re more likely to be more direct about it. In theory, it’s much easier to know what’s “right” for you when you’ve spent more time experiencing what doesn’t work.
Finally, adults are more likely to be looking for someone who makes them happy in reality - not a fantasy of what they think they should be looking for. I’ve seen many in their early 20s leave relationships because they “want to see what else is out there” or they aren’t sure if something better will come along. A more mature person is less likely to be looking for just “fireworks,” and less likely to wonder “what if” about anyone else.
Dating isn’t incredibly easy, regardless of age - it’s filled with uncertainty and butterflies. Still, it’s important to realize that there’s no “perfect time” to date or find the right one for you - and that real love can be found at any stage in life.