Is Work Overtaking your Social Life?
Contributed by: kellyseal on Saturday, May 29 2010 @ 12:53 pm
Last modified on
We all get busy with work, and sometimes we have to put friendships and dating on hold to finish an important project. But what happens when we work overtime on a regular basis, and find ourselves cancelling our dates at the last minute over and over again?
This happened to me when I was online dating. During my lunch breaks, I would send off emails confirming plans, only to find myself still at my desk well after 8pm, canceling with plans with Tom or Jim or Carl for the third time in a row. How could I ever meet anyone if there was always something more important to do at work?
The simple answer is (which took a long time for me to come to term with): my life is more important than my work. Sure, everyone is thankful for their jobs right now if they have them, but that doesn't mean we have to be slaves to our laptops. Our personal lives matter, too.
Following are some things to keep in mind if you find yourself too busy with work to date:
- Remember that your dates are busy, too. Maybe they had deadlines or projects to finish, just like you. They are making sacrifices with their own time in order to meet you, with no expectations that the date would lead to a relationship. Offer them the same courtesy and keep a date when you set it.
- Are you using work as an excuse? Sometimes it's easier to back out on a date when we make ourselves busy at work. I was guilty of this. It takes courage to continue dating and putting yourself out there. When you follow through, even if the date doesn't go well, you at least took another step towards meeting the right one.
- Create boundaries at work. Everyone is entitled to personal time, including those who are single. You might not have the excuse of picking the kids up from daycare, but you do have a life and you shouldn't put it aside. If you have a date scheduled and you're asked to stay late at the last minute, it's ok to say no.
- Put aside the PDA when you're on a date. Ok, you've made it to the date, but are you checking your emails and texts every few minutes, just to make sure everything is ok at work? This isn't helpful for dating. If you really want to meet someone, then give your dates time and consideration without all the distractions. Leave your phone off.