Contributed by: kellyseal on Friday, March 23 2012 @ 09:38 am
Last modified on
Have you had bad luck with online dating? Maybe you haven't had as many matches as you'd hoped for, or maybe too few women have responded to you. If these are your problems, there's a simple fix: it's time to revamp your profile.
In addition to posting pictures that are an accurate reflection of who you are (making sure they are recent, depict you in different ways - like a headshot as well as a surfing shot, and don't include ex-girlfriends or a gang of friends around you), there are a few ways to tweak that profile to get more responses:
Don't be so brief. Instead of three-word descriptions in your profile, or an email that just says, "what's up?" be a little more conversational. Otherwise, the people viewing your profile or reading your emails will have no information to go on. When someone doesn't pique your interest from the beginning, why would you go back and reconsider?
Be original. If you're funny, then show it. If you're adventurous, post pictures of yourself jumping out of airplanes. If you're into music, talk about your playlist or post a photo of yourself playing guitar. If you want to start a conversation, you have to create a topic. With online dating, it's a visual thing - the first impression is your profile, so be creative and true to yourself. (No more typical phrases like "I enjoy long walks on the beach" or "I'm just a nice, easy-going guy" please.)
Be open. If you find that you're not getting many matches or responses to your emails, take another look at your restrictions. Are the age filters you are working with realistic? If you're 40 and only want to date women in their twenties, you're missing out on a whole pool of great candidates. Will you only consider certain types of women, like athletic or religious or within a ten-mile radius of where you live? Try branching out and seeing what happens. You only increase your potential dates and opportunities when you are less restrictive with your filters.
Leave the past in the past. Don't try and list all the things you don't want in a partner in your profile. Maybe you have dated some crazy or clingy women. Don't make those issues the focus of your profile (i.e. writing "no drama queens for me"). In fact, don't mention those issues at all - or you will likely attract the same type of women. Instead, think about your future and what you want going forward.
Move on. If you haven't heard back from a woman who really caught your eye, don't keep emailing her. It's time to let go and move on. Instead of emailing one person at a time, try emailing ten or twenty and see what happens. Online dating is all about reaching out and seeing what happens. Don't take rejection personally because it happens a lot - and to everyone. Just move on to the next - no hurt feelings.