Contributed by: Jet on Tuesday, February 08 2011 @ 09:03 am
Last modified on
In the world of online dating, we form our first impressions based on a profile, a block of text, a three-inch photo. Sometimes, when we subsequently meet someone in person after having read their profile, or blog, we feel as though we know them already - their written words match up perfectly with the person in front of us. And other times... we still respect and enjoy their writing, but in person, the chemistry just isn’t there.
It happens. Occasionally you’ll find someone who looks like the ideal match on paper - similar interests, attractive, funny - and in person there’s just “something” about them that not only isn’t attractive, it might even grate on you! And that’s okay. After all, if all it took was common interests to forge a connection, then every garage band, PTA or sports team would be one big happy family - and we know that’s not often the case.
No one knows exactly what makes a good romantic match, or even a good friendship. And that’s not for lack of trying - scientists theorize constantly about pheromones, even genes. Others tell us that attractiveness is more a state of mind, based on our society or our friends’ opinions, than anything physical. And maybe it’s all of those theories combined, or none of them. The fact is, chemistry is still something nebulous that can’t be predicted or assumed.
So what does this tell us about our dating habits? Well, try not to box yourself in with your expectations. Just as the person who looks perfect on paper can be not-so-perfect in person, so too can someone with differing interests who’s not your “type” actually set off a spark when you meet.
Profiles can be useful in several ways - early identification of red flags, finding the only other Bingo fan in your age bracket, getting that first conversation going - but ultimately, only meeting in person can tell you if you have chemistry together. Why limit the possibilities of finding a great match?