Contributed by: Jet on Tuesday, May 14 2013 @ 08:33 pm
Last modified on
There’s no doubt that first dates are awkward. Think about it: you’re essentially interviewing a potential best friend... while you’re meeting for the very first time. You’re making small talk, but somewhere your brain is assessing your physical compatibility. Ultimately, this could be someone with whom you’re truly “yourself”... but not today. Today is all about first impressions and trying to impress. There’s nothing really “wrong” with dating - after all, if your date isn’t worth a little extra effort, who is? - but it is the way it is: awkward.
So we can’t change the nature of dating, but we can bring a little self-awareness to it that will hopefully make us feel more relaxed. For example: we know that it’s a universal truth that people on a date tend to feel awkward and nervous. However, we always seem to forget that when it comes to our very own dates. You think they’re not wondering if their stomach is growling so loudly it’s audible? You think they’re not worried about whether that gust of wind left them looking like they’ve been in a tornado? Why do you think of your date as a superhuman while you’re only a mere mortal?
In reality, they’re likely feeling nervous and awkward too. So instead of ignoring it, embrace it - make a joke or two about it to relax you both. Understand that dating might be kind of weird, but it can be a fun and exhilarating time, too. Whether or not you meet your true love on this given date, you’re living life, having an adventure and potentially taking the first steps toward even bigger adventures.
The key, though, is to take it all with good humor. For some, it can be difficult to talk about dating with self-awareness without sounding cynical or jaded. If you’re worried that you might fall into this category, remember that it can’t hurt to be extra-clear and positive on a first date with someone who doesn’t know you well. Saying things like, “That’s awesome” or “I really love that” might not be in your standard repertoire, but your sarcasm can take a backseat in the interest of reassuring your date that you’re actually happy to be there.
You might not be able to escape the awkwardness of a first date, but you don’t have to pretend it doesn’t exist, either. Addressing the silliness of the situation - even reveling in it - can relax your date and you as well. It can even establish a bit of a camaraderie: the two of you against the strangeness of a first date. And who doesn’t want an excuse to team up and get closer?