Contributed by: Jet on Saturday, March 06 2010 @ 08:16 am
Last modified on
In online dating, there's a certain situation we hear about all the time: a couple checks out each other's profile, and they're both happy with what they see. Soon they're exchanging emails, and things are going swimmingly. After emailing for awhile, they finally decide to meet – and in person, things fall flat. Maybe one or both of them don't look exactly like their photo, but even more than that, they just didn't have that chemistry in person. Great match on paper, but not a spark to be found in the real world.
We're so accepting of that scenario, but does it ever occur to us that chemistry works both ways? That maybe someone who doesn't make us swoon in a single photo could cause heart palpitations in person?
I cannot tell you how many times I've heard the phrase, “Yeah, looks like a great match based on his profile... but physically he's not my type,” or “She seems really cool, but maybe as a friend. I don't usually like curvy girls.” Not only are those people limiting themselves because they won't step out of their box, but honestly, even the best “matches” on paper are around 50/50 until you see if things work in person. Why are we so willing to place all our faith in a photo, when we know the picture doesn't tell the whole story?
Additionally, some people just aren't photogenic. I know this, because I'm one of them. Sure, I know what I need to do to produce the best picture I can, but usually a random picture of me will literally make other people laugh, because it almost looks like I purposely made myself look as bad as possible (nope, that's just me and a camera). Conversely, I have a male friend who is pleasant-looking, but not particularly amazing – until you take his picture, which invariably comes out looking like a GQ shoot. Some people have it; I don't. Luckily, it hasn't hindered me too much thus far, but I know all too well that sometimes a picture isn't an accurate representation.
In general, we rely mostly on our eyes – think of the phrase, “I'll believe it when I see it.” But as we know, a relationship is based on more than a good photo. Next time you see someone who looks great on paper but isn't quite for you, take a second look, maybe send an email. Cameras can be tricky, and so can chemistry.