Contributed by: kellyseal on Saturday, September 24 2011 @ 08:43 am
Last modified on
When it comes to online dating, we all try to make a good impression with our pictures and profiles. We want more matches to choose from, and we don't want to be p*censored*ed up in favor of someone younger, better looking or more successful. Unfortunately, we can get a little carried away with enhancing our attributes or giving out the wrong information just so we aren't filtered out of someone else's search. But does this really help - or does it hinder our search?
Following are some common areas where people are less than honest when it comes to online dating. If you do any of these, please reconsider. After all, if you and a date hit it off, the truth will come out sooner or later.You don't want to start off with a lie.
Stop posting old photos. People post photos that are old for a variety of reasons. Perhaps you've recently gained weight and you'd like to lose it before you post a current picture of yourself. Or you love that one picture from a trip you took ten years ago because it shows off your hair or smile. Or maybe you're great with Photoshop. Unfortunately, these tactics are misleading to people meeting you for the first time. I encourage you to have a friend help take some current pictures that show you in your best light. In addition to a headshot, also try an action shot of you doing something you love. Research has shown that this is far more effective than a glamour shot.
Be true to your age. Even if you feel shaving only two or three years off your age might help you get more matches, it may work against you. When I did this, I tended to get responses from people who weren't interested in long-term relationships. I learned that opening my own mind and dating people outside my age range comfort zone worked more in my favor.
Height matters. I noticed that many men I dated added about 2 inches on average to their height. While this seems like no big deal, it was something that stood out to me because it was so common. Instead of taking a match's word for it, I subtracted a few inches from the height listed every time I went on a date. And what about the men who were telling the truth?
Don't adjust your body type. If you are a fuller figure woman or flat as a board, then don't hide it. No man wants to be misled, and tastes vary. Men prefer women of all different shapes, so don't think your weight or body type will exclude you from searches. It's worse to lie about your body type and then meet a man in person who was expecting you to look different.
Income does not equal success. Many people lie about their income to look more attractive and successful. Honestly, it's less about the amount of money you make than how p*censored*ionate and ambitious you are when it comes to pursuing your dreams. That is what people find attractive. If you're not comfortable disclosing your income, then leave it off.
Above all, it's not your date's fault if they aren't interested in you after learning you lied to them about age, income, body type, etc. Remember, it doesn't widen your search to be less than honest, it makes your search productive: they will be interested in the real you.